Anger, Managed Page 4

  My heart is beating so loud that I can swear everyone can hear it. I know that it is overly loud to me. Her smile affects me this much. I know it’s probably rarely given. I want to see that smile more and more. It will be yet another addiction to add to the list that is rapidly growing by the minute with her. I feel as though she is beginning to be an obsession. An obsession I do not want to break. It is safe to say I am hooked already. Hook. Line. Sinker.

  “What can I get the two of you to drink this evening?” The waiter asks. I didn’t even notice his approach, because my attention was on the goddess sitting across from me. I look up at the man who appears to be just as taken with her as I am. I clear my throat to get his attention.

  “We would like your best red wine please.” I ask the man who is finally looking at me. I can’t blame him for his attraction but his professionalism is lacking. She is here on a date not to be ogled. Where is his sense of decorum? Hope he isn’t expecting a large tip. Okay I know I am being petty. She is a very beautiful woman and I am sure she gains this kind of attention wherever she goes.

  He nods his head before leaving the table to get our drinks. Ella is staring at me with a mischievous look on her face and it has my curiosity peaked.

  “What?” I ask her. She laughs softly and I find myself smiling with her because the sound makes my heart beat faster. She is radiant.

  “You looked like you wanted to choke that waiter and I didn’t think you were capable of violence. It appears jealousy is not your strongest suit.” She giggles again. Damn it is like a symphony in its beauty.

  “No I suppose it isn’t. In my defense, I have never been jealous before.” I tell her honestly. I never cared that a man looked at any of the women I have ever dated. Probably because I never felt this strongly connected to a woman before.

  “Oh please.” She rolls her eyes in disbelief.

  “I’m quite serious. I have been jealous before but never over a woman. It was over trivial stuff like someone getting the intern position I wanted or the kid in front of me getting the last chocolate milk.” I tell her. I honestly never felt this way about a woman. Not even Natalia, whom I dated all the way through high school. I had thought we would always be together, marry and have children. She ended up getting pregnant the summer after high school. Problem was that I was already away at school when it happened. I wasn’t as upset as I should have been about it. I know most men would have been crushed.

  Now Ella blinks up at me in disbelief. She is strongly opinionated about men and not in a good way. I wonder if she also has daddy issues. I can only show her that I am different because no matter what I am not backing away. I want her. I will have her, even if I have to fight for her.

  Chapter 7. Ella

  We talk about everything from food to family and the entire time I am waiting for him to show me the bad side of him. The side that will make me think twice about getting involved with him. He never shows it, in fact he makes me want him even more than I already did. He is funny, sweet and so fucking hot that I feel like my panties are constantly damp. He makes me want him in a way that should be illegal.

  The dinner was wonderful too and I didn’t feel the least bit self-conscious. I usually do when I eat in front of the opposite sex. Men always expect a woman to eat daintily. You know what I mean, a small salad and little bites. That isn’t me. I ordered a steak and devoured it before moving on to a bake potato. I love my food and my eating reflects it. I work hard and I eat plenty. It is usually shocking to men to watch me enjoy my meal.

  He didn’t once look at me as though I were an alien and that earned him points in my book. I hope he continues to be this way. He might just prove me wrong in the theory that all men are swine. I really hope so because the way he makes me feel is nothing small or something I would want to ignore.

  “Would you like dessert? They have the best pecan pie I have ever had.” There he goes earning even more points. Not only was he not disgusted by my appetite but now he is offering to get me a dessert. I should marry this one before he gets away. I roll my eyes at my own inner musings. I sound like an idiot woman who stalks a man after one dinner.

  “That sounds great. I love pecan pie.” Great I am even sounding like a twit. Why not trade in my gun for pomp poms or a baton. I could cover myself in glitter and start farting rainbows.

  He takes my hand across the table and I melt. His warm palm is comforting and exhilarating. I want more of this man. I think I will be staying at his house tonight. Not that I wasn’t already planning to stay there but now it will be in his bed. I could lie and say it is to protect him. It would be a bald face lie and I pride myself in at least being honest with myself. If you can’t be honest with yourself then who can you be honest with?

  He smiles at me as his finger rubs over my knuckles. His smile is panty melting. It always has been. I wonder what he is thinking about. What put that smile on his face? I am about to ask him when I am interrupted by the waiter. Ty orders us two slices of pecan pie.

  “Excuse me.” I tell him as I stand up and head over to the restrooms. I need a moment to myself just as much as I need to relieve my bladder. He is potent in his masculinity. He isn’t one of those men who try to intimidate or act tough to be masculine, like the guys I have dated in the past. He is just that kind of person that is manly without trying. He commands the room yet he is very kind. The more I get to know him, the more I want him and not just in my bed.

  This is already far more serious than my last three relationships have been. Maybe that should scare me. I shake my head. If I let fear push away the only decent man on the planet then I may as well just agree to be alone for the rest of my life. I would become a cat lady with a billion fur balls in a tiny apartment. I do not even like cat. The thought of the cat urine and the smell of the litter boxes is what finally makes the decision for me. I am going to give this a chance. All my effort.

  I use the restroom and wash my hands. I check myself over. I still look good. I never cared about the way I look but I certainly do now. I want him to find me beautiful. He obviously already desires me but I want to know that he burns for me as much as I do for him. A craving, an obsession that can only be slaked in one way.

  I leave the restroom after one more glance back only to realize my skirt is tucked in to my underwear as the door closes behind with a thwack. Of course everyone looks over at me as I pull the offending material out of my panties. I feel my face heat as I look over and see Ty’s eyes trained on me. Mother fucker. Leave it to me to make our date so memorable. I do the walk of shame, just not the naughty, I spent the night at a frat house, walk of shame.

  I sit down and look at him directly in the eye to see if he is laughing. This will tell me his character and I want to know. No, I need to know.

  Chapter 8. Ty

  I see her come out of the bathroom and look over her shoulder. She freezes and her shoulders slump before she turns back to survey the room. I wonder what she is doing. Of course every man in the vicinity has their eyes on her. She looks around and then pulls at the back of her skirt and only then do I realize her skirt is tucked in to her colorful panties. She turns and our eyes meet. She knows now that I saw what happened. Her face flushed and I can practically feel the heat from it.

  Her embarrassment just endears her more to me. I didn’t think she had it in her to be embarrassed. I love that this proves she is human just like me. I have been putting her on such a pedestal that this seems to even the playing field. I know it is strange. I get that the obsession itself isn’t normal either. We need to make our own rules now. Unconventional rules for an unconventional relationship.

  She walks toward me not making eye contact and sits down across from me. She finally looks up and meets my eye. She has a look on her face that tells me that she challenges me to say something. I see it in her eyes. She wants me to laugh at her so that she can walk away. I know better. For one it wasn’t funny. For two it was something that happens to all of us on occasion. Maybe not
exactly the same but at least similar. Third, I know that she is already embarrassed and I would never do anything to upset her.

  “I know you are coming home with me tonight but I would very much like you to spend the night in my bed.” There give her something else to think about. She sucks in a breath and her sexy smile returns.

  “Depends on how good this pie is.” She says just before the waiter sits a plate of pie in front of her. He sits mine down and asks if we need anything else. I said no before he leaves us again. She forks up the first bite and I watch as she lifts her fork to her mouth. Her sexy red lips open and she slides the fork inside of her mouth. Her lips close around the fork and my cock jerks, imaging it is my dick her lips are wrapped around so beautifully. She slides the fork out and moans deep in her throat causing my cock to push painfully against my zipper.

  “You win. The pie is the best I have ever had. I guess this means I will be in your bed tonight.” She says with a smile. Fuck. I growl long and deep as I watch her devour her pie, my own is forgotten. I can’t take my eyes away from her long enough to try eating anything. I watch the fork as she suckles the food off of it and all I can think about is her on her knees. I’m holding a fistful of her hair as I fuck her beautiful mouth.

  She looks up at me with a smirk and I know that she knows exactly what she is doing to me. I want so badly to put her over my knee and spank her pretty bottom until it turns a pretty shade of pink. I’m not usually in to spanking. I am usually a restrained and commanding kind of guy but I have never gotten off on hurting a woman. It normally repulses me. With Ella I want to spank her because I know she will like it. Do not ask how I know, I just do.

  The waiter brings the check and I quickly throw some cash on the table. Far more that necessary, all so that I do not have to wait. I need to taste her before I go mad. I stand up and put out my hand.

  “Come.” I tell her. She looks up at me and gives me a measured look before taking my hand. I know it wasn’t easy for her to let me take control. I usually only exert control in the bedroom but thinking about her ass in the air as I spank her has made me out of control. I need her more than I have ever needed anything. That is a very scary thought, though even that will not detour me.

  I lead her to the car with my hand on her lower back. I ignore the hostess who again tries to get my attention. Can’t she see that I am taken and in ways that no other woman could ever duplicate. Women like the hostess have never been able to catch my attention and they never will. I like my woman to be tough yet sexy. She needs to have a great sense of humor and last but not least, her name has to be Ella Richards. She is perfect for me.

  When we reach the car I grab her around the waist and press her against the car as I take her lush, sweet mouth. I moan as she opens for me and I penetrate her mouth with my tongue, taking in her sweetness. She whimpers and what little room I had left in my pants is lost. My cock hardens and I press it into her soft belly. I want her to feel me, so she knows just how much she affects me. I want inside of her more than I want my next breath. Breathing is overrated when you are devouring such sweetness anyway.

  “Stay with me tonight.” I make it more of a statement than a question. She looks up at me and I press my forehead against hers as I wait for her to say something.

  “Yes.” She says barely above a whisper. Fuck yeah. I take her mouth again and kiss her as though my life depends on it. She is the life giving nutrients I need to survive. I tangle my tongue with hers and enjoy her sighs and moans. I only pull away when we are both breathless and I feel like I am about to explode. My cock throbs and I know I was seconds from cumming.

  “Fuck.” I say as I pull away. I look down at her dazed expression and her swollen lips. Fuck me. She looks like a goddess. I want to possess her in every way. I want to corrupt her. I want to ruin her for all other men. I want her to crave only me. What the hell is happening to me?

  It couldn’t possibly be love this soon, yet I can’t deny how I feel. I am already destroyed. She owns me. I belong to her. I know it doesn’t make much sense. Logically I would argue that it takes time to get to know someone enough to love them. I never believed in love at first sight. I have to now. I know what this is and I know I am feeling it intensely. I am head over heels, ass over teakettle, irrevocably in love with this woman.

  “Hurry.” She whispers in my ear, gaining my attention again. She wants me as much as I want her. I open the passenger door to the car and help her inside. I shut the door and walk around to my side. I climb in and start the car. I take her hand in mine and pull it to my lips. I give it a small kiss before sitting it on my thigh as I put the car in reverse. Having her hand on me helps calm me. My world is right. Perfect, for she is coming home with me.

  Chapter 10. Ella

  My stomach fluttered as we pull into his driveway. I can’t believe I agreed to sleep with him tonight. I look over at him and I feel my channel tighten with need. Okay, so I see why I agreed. It is more than that though. If it was a purely physical response, I wouldn’t be apprehensive but it goes well beyond that and in to something far more visceral. More intense. If I give myself a chance to think about it for too long, I will start to panic. It’s not because I think he would hurt but more so that he could, that it’s even a possibility.

  I have lousy luck with men. Do not even get me started on some of the bastards I have dated. I seem to pick the absolute worst men. I have been starting to think that maybe I shouldn’t date anymore and break the cycle. Maybe if I do not choose them and they choose me instead, it might be different. Then again, isn’t that what is happening here. Ty noticed me and even went to anger management just to get a chance to meet me. He chose me.

  He shuts off the car and climbs out. He comes around and opens my door. He holds his hand out to me and I take it again. I choose to see if we can make something out of this. It would be a shame to turn my back on the first man to make me respond this way. I am wet and the man hasn’t even touched me between the legs. I have never felt that way. I have liked men, do not get me wrong but this goes well beyond that. A guy usually has to tongue my clit for a while to make me this damn wet.

  I follow him inside the house. The door shuts and he has me pinned to the door. Holy shit. His mouth crashes down on mine as he pins my hands above my head.

  “We aren’t making it to the bedroom for this round.” He says as he grinds his large, hard cock against me.

  “I can’t fucking take one more second without being inside of you.” He rasps against my neck as he tugs at me clothes. My skirt is up around my waist and he yanks my top down, exposing my bra covered breasts to him. He pulls the first cup down and he latches on to a nipple with a deep moan that has me panting. He yanks my panties down without releasing my breast. His finger finds my bare mound.

  “Oh fuck you’re bare. I have to taste it.” He says as he drops to his knees in front of me. He stares at my pussy and it makes me flush with embarrassment. I know he has to see the moisture and the evidence of my need for him.

  “It’s fucking gorgeous. This is the prettiest pussy in the fucking world.” He groans as he leans in and sniffs. He moans and licks his lips. I am so close to cumming, just from his reactions to my body. I never had a man look at me with such reverence before. It is a huge turn on.

  “Look at all of this dew. Is it for me darling?” He asks as he runs his finger over my lips and holds his finger out for me to see the droplets of my arousal. I nod my head.

  “I bet you’re as sweet as you smell.” He says as he licks his finger. He groans and his tongue darts out and he pokes it between my lips and straight to my hot button. I cry out as licks and sucks at my clit. I throw my head back as I let the pleasure take me over. I will never forget the sounds he is making as he eats me. He sounds like he is eating the sweetest fruit and he can’t seem to get enough. My hips buck and I can’t seem to stop them.

  “Ty, oh god.” I say, trying to find relief. I am so close to cumming but I am waiting for something
and I can’t for the life of me figure out what it is.

  “Cum for me, now.” He growls against my pussy and I feel it hit me look a tsunami. It’s like my body was waiting for permission from him. It wanted his command. This is what I have been looking for. All men before have been lacking. I need a dominant man who can handle me, who isn’t intimidated by me. I never thought I would find him until now. I find him and now I may never be able to let him go.

  “Ty!” I shout as my channel spasms and I explode in a full body orgasm. I shake and twitch as I cry out his name over and over again, like a chant. This is it. This is that kind of orgasm you get addicted to. This is what he will be able to use to tie me to him forever because I will forever crave it.

  “I didn’t think it was possible for you to be more beautiful than you looked tonight but watching you cum has surpassed it.” He says as he stands. He yanks open his pants and pulls out his large, fat cock and gives it a stroke before lifting me up. I wrap my legs around his waist as he positions the head at my entrance. I have a moment of apprehension about his size but that quickly fades as he begins to burrow his way through my wet heat.

  It stings a little as he pushes into me more.

  “Relax baby. Let me in.” He whispers in my ear. I try to relax but it really is uncomfortable. He brings his hand up between our bodies and strums my clit with his thumb. I moan and my body relaxes some more allowing more of him inside of me.

  “You’re so tight baby. I’m not sure I can hold back any longer.” His words causes my channel to spasm. I love that I affect him so much.

  “Fuck.” He shouts as he thrusts the rest of the way in and rides out his orgasm. He looks pained as he releases himself inside of me with my name on his lips and a prolonged moan. His legs start to give out and he takes a few steps backwards, carrying me with him and collapses in a chair with me on top of him. I moan as it causes his cock to push further inside. Holy shit. He’s still hard.